ATOMIC
WAR BRIDE (1960)/THIS IS NOT A TEST (1961)Directors: Veljko Bulajic, Fredric Gadette
Something Weird Video/Image Entertainment
ATOMIC
WAR BRIDE (1960)/THIS IS NOT A TEST (1961)Every child of the 1950s and early
1960s had a pulsating fear in their lives. For some, it was a monster living
in their closet. For others, a playground bully whose goal it was in life to
beat his peers to a bloody pulp. But above all other phobias of the era, nuclear
war was Number One on the list. Newsreels blared horror stories of the Soviets
preparing nuclear weapons and projected footage of victims of nuclear and atomic
bombs, and television was just beginning to show such gruesome sights on the
small screen as well. And 40 years later, Something Weird Video releases the
don't-feel-good disc of the year: a double bill of 
ATOMIC
WAR BRIDE and THIS IS NOT A TEST. Heaven help us.
Yugoslavia was just as nervous
about nuclear war as the United States, as proven by the opening feature ATOMIC
WAR BRIDE. Lensed in 1960 in Zagreb, the film details the story of John, a young
man who plans to marry his fiancee Maria after war is declared. Martial law
overcomes the land, and male citizens are forced into the Army (still standard
practice in Europe). But John is a strong pacifist and faces execution if his
views are made public! An eternally bleak 75 minutes later, the viewer is left
completely bereft of emotion after the shattering finale. The cast is adequate
all around, and many sequences in the film are realistic. The real punch in
the gut for me was that this reviewer lived 
in
Serbia during the Bosnian War and had to travel through Croatia and Bosnia to
reach Italy for vacation. Each and every one of the buildings seen demolished
in ATOMIC WAR BRIDE had a mirror image in the same location circa 1992. While
some (including, apparently, Something Weird Video) may find these films and
their short subject counterparts subject of high camp today, after viewing such
atrocities in real life and following the air attack on 9/11, this reviewer
simply cannot follow suit. Have your Kleenex handy, this is a film that is not
easily forgotten after the closing credits.
Fasten your seat belts and wipe
the tears from your eyes to finish the double feature with THIS IS NOT A TEST,
one of the more infamous Atomic War features. Incredibly low budget, TEST plays
at times like an Off-Broadway stage play, set in one isolated location and never
straying very far from it. Opening with policeman Dan Colter blocking off the
highway in the hills of California, a motley crew of travelers collide with
each other when an atomic missile is set to drop in the Big City (unnamed, but
quite probably Los Angeles or Hollywood). The majority of the running time is
solid characterization, aided by a solid cast of unknowns and never-will-be's
who make the most of their roles. Among the lost souls are an obnoxious beatnik
and his love-smitten galpal, a knife murderer, a rich couple and their pet Chihuahua,
and a comely lass and her curmudgeon grandfather. Sparks fly, love blooms, lives
are lost, and temperatures rise before a makeshift shelter is created from a
moving truck. But how long can this group survive? If the bomb doesn't kill
them, they'll do themselves in! An eerily claustrophobic finale will leave any
viewer squirming in his seat. Director Fredric Gadette has created a minor masterpiece
of suspense cinema, and while a mere 5 years ago it would seem dated, with the
looming shadow of terrorism hanging over the world, the effectiveness of THIS
IS NOT A TEST remains unchallenged, save for some choice beatnik dialogue.
Both
films are presented in full-frame black-and-white presentations. For rarities
such as these, both fare rather well. ATOMIC WAR BRIDE is a little fuzzy, but
it is doubtful there were many prints struck of this film in this country. Try
finding this film in *any* reference book! THIS IS NOT A TEST uses a print that
skips at times, sometimes occurring during dialogue, but it should be stressed
again the number of available prints this film had: not many. The mono sound
is very good for both features.
The extra features on this disc
can be found guilty of some camp value, unlike the two feature films. First,
witness two local New York public service announcements about how logical it
is to buy your 
family
a fallout shelter! I wonder how many homes in New York State still have fallout
shelters?? "You Can Beat the A-Bomb" tells the story of a handful
of families who survive The Bomb because they were well informed about shelters,
radiation poisoning, and medical attention. This particular short subject does
have some rather ridiculous acting and situations played out on the screen.
"Survival Under Atomic Attack" is more of the same, instructions on
how to survive in your home and out on the street. The highlight of the short
subjects just may be the infamous "Duck and Cover," an animated short
subject that must have traumatized more youths than it educated! Excerpts from
this classroom classic have 
appeared
in documentaries, TV specials, and commercials, so everyone should be familiar
with Bert the Turtle by now. "Medical Aspects of Nuclear Radiation"
details the medical after-effects of nuclear radiation on the human body, how
to treat them, and how to protect yourselves. Nifty animation. "One World
or None" is another downbeat and emotionally disintegrating short subject:
a grievous narrator gives statistics of deaths caused by atomic bombs, there's
footage shown of victims of Hiroshima and Nagasaki, and some cheap animation
that is very effective. A yucky experience. "Atomic Blonde in Action"
is a totally inappropriate inclusion, two blondes stripping!! Something Weird,
we know you're weird, but this is going a bit too far!!
What a ride. What a sad, unsettling,
teary-eyed ride. Something Weird, you have achieved something that many mainstream
documentaries and educational programs have failed to do. You have left this
viewer emotionally stunned, broken and battered and barely left breathing after
experiencing ATOMIC WAR BRIDE and THIS IS NOT A TEST. Recommended viewing after
being shattered by this double feature: a good dose of "The Brady Bunch"
and "Full House" to sanitize your soul. Then never speak of this episode
of your life again.... (Casey
Scott)