DRACULA (1979)
Director: John Badham
Universal

Frank Langella, just who do you think you are? You're not Bela Lugosi, Christopher Lee, Max Schreck, or Carlos Villarias, that's for sure. Heck, you're not even Ed Wood's chiropractor. But you're still a fine actor, still a contender. Sir Laurence Olivier, just who the heck do you think you are? You may be able to play Richard III, Henry V, Hamlet, or Neil Diamond's father in THE JAZZ SINGER (1980), buy you're no Van Helsing. Don't fret, neither is Hugh Jackman. DRACULA (1979) is not your average Dracula picture, neither is it your average, gushy date film. Think of it as SATURDAY NIGHT FEVER meets Bram Stoker meets "All My Children." It's not consistently entertaining, but it has enough diamonds in the rough to keep your stakes at bay. Hey, at least it is different, and from what the DVD's accompanying commentary and "making-of" featurette report, that's what its makers set out to achieve. They wanted a film for the ladies.

The venerable tale of Dracula--a tale we all know--is not supposed to be wrapped up in a doily and caressed. This is not a Harlequin romance, featuring Count Fabio. Remember: "Boo!", not "Mwah!" It had me scratching my noggin and wondering, "Where-oh-where is the violence, the claws, the drool and blood, the dirt, the T and the A, the butt-kicking?" This is, literally and figuratively, a Dracula without fangs. It's too elegant and gentle to be a frightfest, as if it was reluctant to be-egads!--a horror movie. How can so much produce so little? The budget is umpteenth times more expensive than the Tod Browning version, yet it generates only a fraction of that classic's chills. It is a pity so much was flushed away, especially the cast and production design. But, hey, it is different.

True, the outrageously handsome Langella (no accent), reprising his smash Broadway role as the king of the bloodsuckers, may come close to the original conception of Dracula, as a Byronic, urbane, charismatic hunk. His Count is not a swift-footed, bone-chilling, odious villain-he's just misunderstood and lonely and big-haired. Bah! Maybe he made a better Skeletor, I don't know. Langella's Transylvanian cosmopolitan, however, is not as bland as Trevor Eve's Jonathan Harker, Kate Nelligan's Lucy Seward, or Tony Haygarth's bug-munching Renfield. It does have the cult wonder Donald Pleasance (hooray!), constantly tossing a candy into his gob. Unfortunately, as Dr. Jack Seward, he does not have much to do, just run around, worry, and shout. He's run around, worried, and shouted better in better pictures. Would have loved to have him cast as the Van Helsing, but c'est la vie. But guess who was?

Think of it: the greatest actor of the twentieth century hunting down the undead. The novelty of casting Oliver as the Professor wears away fast, and all you're stuck with is a lily-livered, fuddy-duddy, hammy vampire hunter. Count how many unintentional laughs Olivier elicits. Or, better yet, have a drink. But you get the feeling that Olivier, who was ill and getting up there in age, knew full well he was in overproduced crap, so why not deliver crap and still pick up a check. And that ghastly accent! What is that accent! Where is that accent from! Empty your bladder before hearing that accent.

What does this epic have going for it? Trippy love scenes, designed by James Bond's Maurice Binder; fantastic sets, especially the interior of the Count's Castle; prime photography; fine locations; effective makeup and special effects, especially the wall-climbing scenes; and another grand score by John Williams. But, alas, the film is still hollow and tedious.

On to the disc. Overall, it is a job well-done. There's an above-average 2.35:1 widescreen anamorphic transfer, in Dolby Digital 2.0, no less-so if you want to make Olivier's accent scare the neighbors, go ahead. Some of the music has been rescored. Universal has pried open its usually tight fists and delivered some decent extras. There's a high-quality commentary by director John Badham, which has a few gaps, an informative behind-the-scenes documentary, and an okay photo gallery. Trailer? You get no trailer. The chaptering will do, but the garish artwork. (Anthony Vitamia)

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